Coco Covers the 2009 Smackdown/ECW Manila House Show

The show started fairly late, which was odd, because the last two shows we attended back in 2006 commenced on the dot. Also, the house was not full. I was thinking only 85% of the seats were taken, which was also peculiar, seeing as this was a one night only gig. The 2006 shows we attended were packed to the rafters.

Anyway, Justin Roberts comes out and welcomes us to the show.

John Morrison v. Shelton Benjamin

Morrison comes out first to a major pop. Some guy is holding up an “I am a JoMosexual” sign. Benjamin comes out to a chorus of boos as expected, and the show gets going. Match starts off slow with the two of them performing at least 87 variations of the headlock on each other. Action picks up with your usual stuff from these two: springboard shin kick and tilt-a-whirl DDT from Morrison, thrust kick to the face and Samoan drop from Benjamin, and lots of monkey-like jumping from both. Morrison finishes off with arguably the second-best finisher in the business (next to the Canadian Destroyer), Starship Pain.

What’s really cool is that after the match, even Benjamin received an ovation on his way out. This happens throughout the night, for both faces and heels.

Evan Bourne v. Mark Henry

I brought a sign that said “Sydal” but no one probably noticed. This was a pretty short and borderline squash match. The only offense Bourne got in were a couple of spin kicks, a standing moonsault, and that thing where he jumps off the top rope and lands on your face with his crotch. Speaking of the top rope, the send-home saw Bourne taking off and ending up in the tender and caring arms (note sarcasm) of The World’s Strongest Man, which eventually led to the World’s Strongest Slam.

Post-match: Henry steps over a roadkill-resembling Bourne, and the latter walks out limping. Ovation for both.

Michelle McCool and Alicia Fox v. Melina and Gail Kim, with Maria as Special Guest Referee

Lots of showboating from both camps before the match even starts, much to the delight of the future sex offenders in the crowd. Quote from Bim: “Do you realize that at this moment, there are ten (10) glorious tits in the ring right now?” That pretty much sums this match up.

Melina gets double-teamed throughout and gives a hot tag to Kim, who cleans house and finishes Fox off with that, er, finisher of hers.

Dolph Ziggler v. The Great Khali

Ziggler comes out and cuts a great promo on how he will single-handedly double the divorce rate in Manila by merely taking his vest off. Divorce is illegal in the Philippines, by the way. Jackass.

The Great Khali inexplicably comes out to a MONSTER pop. Don’t think that it’s an Asian thing, because India is an ocean away from these here shores, and our cultures barely have anything in common. It was insane. Anyway, Ziggler does a lot of running around and playing to the crowd, which I thought was pretty funny. He reminds me of a young Chris Jericho.

Ziggler tried to focus on Khali’s knees but Khali couldn’t sell a single move even if his life depended on it. Why was this guy World Champion at one point again? The Punjabi Playboy hits a couple of solid slaps on Ziggler’s chest and seals it with a two-handed chokeslam.

Post-match: Ziggler receives a few boos as he stands up but eventually gets some cheers on his way out.

INTERMISSION

Christian v. Jack Swagger v. Tommy Dreamer (c) for the ECW Championship

Announcer Justin Roberts announces that there will be a special guest announcer for this match (hmmm), and it’s the “Official” ECW General Manager, Tiffany. I guess she’s not an “interim” manager anymore?

Christian comes out first and points to a group of kids who were holding up a giant “PEEPS” sign, but not at me and my awesome “Captain Charisma” sign. Sadness. Rage Against the Machine’s “On Your Knees” blares throughout the arena and out comes the All-American American, Jack Swagger. Finally, Dreamer makes his entrance and a huge “E-C-Dub! E-C-Dub” chant erupts.

Christian plays “Yay/Boo” with the crowd by pointing at Swagger, and the crowd goes BOO. He points at himself and the crowd goes YAY. He starts pointing at Dreamer (YAY). Back at Swagger (BOO). Christian points to the referee this time (YAY). Swagger again (BOO).

The match starts with Christian and Dreamer double-teaming on Swagger. Dreamer was pretty much a non-factor in this match, as he got knocked out of the ring fairly, leaving Christian and Swagger doing most of the dirty work.

The highlight of the match was Dreamer attempting a superplex on Christian, but Swagger runs over for a powerbomb on Dreamer. I think Manila just had its first mini-Tower of Doom. Towards the end, Christian goes for the Unprettier on Swagger, but the latter reverses and drives Christian into the ring post. Dreamer sneaks up and hits a DDT, leading to the 1-2-3.

Post-match: Dreamer calls up a fan who was holding up an “Innovator of Violence” sign into the ring. He also hugs him and gives him his ring-worn shirt. Another “E-C-Dub!” chant erupts. I damn near cried.

Chris Jericho v. Rey Mysterio (c) for the Intercontinental Championship, with Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat as Special Guest Referee

Steamboat comes out first.

One half of the Unified Tag Team Champions and the greatest wrestler to ever live then walks down the aisle to a huge reaction. Half the people were booing, half were chanting “Y2J,” and some were even doing that “We’re Not Worthy!” bow (i.e. myself and Bim).

Jericho gets on the mic and goes on with his usual spiel of how we were a bunch of hypocrites, and how the people who were chanting “Y2J” were lowlifes who would never accomplish anything, unlike he has. He runs down the list: 4-time Tag Champion, 5-time World  Champion, and an unprecedented 9-Time Intercontinental Champion. He also referred to Manila as a jungle, and that before the night ended, he’d unmask Mysterio and expose him for the fraud that he is, just like every single one of us in the crowd. All this time, Bim and I were like “What you’re saying is all true! We love you!”

Mysterio comes out and there were some faint boos (seems like Manila is Jericho country). This turned out to be the best match of the night with Jericho controlling most of the match. At one point, Mysterio was perched on one of the top ropes and was eventually unmasked by Chris (though it looked like he took it off himself) and he rolled out of the ring to put it back on.

Some other highlights: Mysterio hitting a seated senton off the top rope and Mysterio hitting his trademark springboard flying crossbody, which admittedly looks pretty damn cool in real life.

I counted at least five 619 attempts, the first three of which were avoided by Jericho. The fourth was caught by Jericho and this led to the Walls, and the crowd went nuts. Mysterio gets to the ropes and Y2J throws a hissy fit. He heads to the outside and grabs a steel chair, only for it to be taken away by Steamboat. Jericho leans and reaches for the chair from between the top and second ropes (so you know what’s coming). Rey-Rey finally hits the 619 and a springboard splash for the win.

Post-match: Jericho attacks Steamboat from behind but the Hall of Famer counters with a few punches and chops of his own, fending off the Ayatollah of Rock N’ Rolla.

Jeff Hardy v. CM Punk (c) for the World Heavyweight Championship

Really slow and boring match. I mean, I know these two work hard and are great guys and all, but… I don’t know. I wish Edge were here. Both came out as faces to huge pops, but some were already booing Punk. They shake hands intermittently throughout the match, so I figured something was up. At one point, Hardy was knocked out of the ring and Punk held up the ropes, as if to assist Jeff in coming back in. As predicted, Punk turns on Hardy and kicks the living shit out of him, resulting in a chorus of boos (and a couple of muffled YAYs from me and Bim).

The end saw Hardy missing on the Swanton, Punk attempting the GTS, Hardy countering and attempting the Twist of Fate, and Punk re-countering by hooking both of Hardy’s legs for a clean pin.

LAAAAAAME.

Overall, great show. Seeing Jericho and Christian in person was well worth the price of admission. I hope it won’t take the WWE another three years to come back.

Biggest Pops:

1. Jeff Hardy/CM Punk (tie)
2. The Great Khali (WTF)
3. John Morrison
4. Rey Mysterio
5. Chris Jericho

Biggest Heat:

1. CM Punk (after turning on Hardy)
2. Dolph Ziggler
3. Shelton Benjamin
4. Jack Swagger
5. Chris Jericho